The “ideal body” mock-up that anatomists have produced is the stuff of nightmares.
The typical person doesn’t really see the ideal body as having “the shock-absorbing legs on an emu.”
However, it’s what one team imagined when they sought to develop a body devoid of any flaws unique to humans.
The video depicts anatomist Alice Roberts at the end of her quest to build a human-like body entirely from scratch.
And we sincerely wish she hadn’t.
Audience members were understandably terrified as the mock-up body, or Alice 2.0 as it is popularly known in the show, was revealed.
It appears as though the body has emu legs and a baby’s head protrudes from its stomach in a sequence that was cut from the Alien movies.
Before revealing Frankenstein’s monster, Roberts says the endeavor has “been an exceptional one” and she is “terribly excited” to see the outcome.
The anatomist then starts counting down with the audience, which results in a scream from Roberts and a variety of repulsive noises from the audience.
Everyone breaks out in laughter at this point since the figure resembles an actual Avatar character holding an iPhone.
“Oh no, I can’t look at it,” Roberts says about her supposedly perfect self.
Speaking of the child protruding from the figure’s stomach, Roberts adds: “The baby’s the weirdest thing. That is the weirdest thing, but it’s very cute at the same time.”
To be honest, it doesn’t seem worth it to envision childbirth without agony, thus the baby was included.
If you needed any more motivation to watch the video, there is a slow-mo pan around the figure set to dramatic music.
Roberts claims that Alice 2.0 has a “chimps strong lower back” to “correct the defects of our failed transition to standing upright” in order to explain her peculiar traits.
She also possesses “emu-like legs that absorb impact.” But that’s not all; the figure also includes “small pumps in her thighs” to “increase blood circulation.”
And last, but by no means least: “Beneath her breast-less chest lies the reliable heart of a dog and the graceful lungs of a swan.” Because hasn’t everyone, at one point in their life, looked at a swan and commented on its graceful lungs…
For optimal combat ability, Alice 2.0 also includes a neck with a “choke resistant windpipe.”
We’d really like to see Alice 2.0’s Top Trump card, even if we’re honestly still a little baffled by what we just saw.